90 Days with Jesus-Day 62 (Saturday's blog)

This journey is oh so beautiful and sweet to me. God is bringing me full circle to where we first began. Lately He's been speaking lots to me about trusting others and my relationships with other people after my relationship with Him. It's an area of my life He's had to work hard on.

I'm not as trusting as I once used to be. After you get hurt, betrayed, walked on by others over and over again you begin to build a wall around you so it doesn't happen again. It's not been real long since God delivered me from depression. Actually I wrote about it in last night's blog of how God brought me to an event to tell me it was time to cross over from Depression into More in Christ. Since the night God delivered me from the deep dark place I promised Him I would be choosy in who I let "in" and who I would trust.

This morning as I was driving to work I was working on my scripture memorization. The scripture is Psalm 56:11: "In God I have put my trust, I shall not be afraid. What can man do to me?" THEN GOD SPOKE. "Alicia, it's time to tear down the rest of that wall and start letting people in again." I have to be totally honest with you. I"m scared to death to let people in again, but it's what HE wants and I must obey. His Word says I can put my trust in Him!

Where does that put me? Vulnerable. It puts me back in a place to show people who I really am. Well, who am I? I"m a young Christian woman who loves Jesus to pieces and loves to make new Christian friends. The truth is that I've taken 6 different spiritual gifts test and 100% of the time they come back with the following results: #1 Spiritual Gift: Evangelism #2 Spiritual Gift: Encouragement. It's who God made me to be. I am a person who dives deep into friendships and gives all of herself to them. I prefer to meet people face to face than over some social media place because I love building relationships with a human not a piece of equipment. I'm the weird girl who sends cards, letters, etc to friends just because. I don't do it to receive anything in return. It's just my way of showing them I care. Now is it nice if they write back?! Sure, but it's not required!

Last but not least...I am very tenderhearted! No, I'm not an emotional basket case. I'm female and it's how God made me. When I use the words I love you I truly mean that. Those are 3 words I hardly use so when I use them I truly mean it.

God is working on me little by little, day by day. The most important relationship of all is my relationship with Him! So on this night I would like to share with you a song that really touches my heart. It brings me to tears because it shows me just how Jesus sees me!

90 Days with Jesus-Day 61 (Friday's blog)

As I read my devotion this morning God brought me back to a familiar scripture that reminded me of a place I was about 2 years. You see I was in this deep dark pit called depression. There were no comforting words to get me out of that place and it seemed so dark and dreary.

I can remember one day opening up my Bible and reading Psalm 40:1-3. I read it and thought what a nice verse but I"m in the midst of depression what can that verse do for me? Little did I know that would become the verse that God would use to show me where He brought me from.

One thing I can remember ever so vividly during that time is that satan the accuser was there to visit me everyday and remind me of my past sin, how I wasn't good enough, and that nobody would ever love me. He would whisper in my ear day after day....BUT THEN......

One Summer day I was visiting my friend Marge. I said to her, "Hey Marge, there's this VBS for women at the Ferguson Center. There's this chick that's gonna preach and I think there might be music. You wanna go? She said, "Well, I don't have any plans and I feel great today...Sure, let's go." So, we headed down that way and got to the Ferguson Center. We walked in and I saw all kind of women and they were happy and smiling! Time came for us to enter into the Ferguson Center seating area. We sat towards the back. The music began and it was nice and the songs were great. Then time for the sermon. The theme for the 3 days was "Crossing Over from mediocrity to more in Christ." I can remember just sitting listening. I was familiar with the passage of scriptures used but had never heard it presented quite like that. OH BUT THEN.....There was this skit called "Room At your Table." It talks about room at Jesus' table and how it doesn't matter what kind of excuses you bring Him, there's always room for one more." The tears began to flow...I couldn't stop crying. That skit was for ME. God gently whispered, "It's time to cross over Alicia. It's time to come back and sit at my table. It doesn't matter what the devil has said to you, you are precious, it doesn't matter how much straying you've done, and it doesn't matter what others have said to you....YOU ARE ALWAYS WELCOME AT MY TABLE. It's time to cross over from Depression to Dancing." I felt God lift the weight of depression off of me that night and I've never been the same.

So on this 61st day of the journey I'm so glad that God has planted my feet on solid ground, and established my goings! He is my Rock! He is my firm foundation and it's in Him I am still crossing over, being transformed and becoming more like Him! Thank you Lord!

90 days with Jesus-Day 60 (Thursday's blog)

Tonight my cup runneth over! God has filled me to overflowing on this day! Why? Because every day I fall more and more in love with Jesus and my relationship with Him. Oh my friend this is such a beautiful place to be. Walking and talking with Jesus daily, digging deep into His Word and letting that still small voice speak so powerfully....Oh How I love being on the Mountain with Jesus!

Here's the most profound thing I've learned to date: If I'm going to spend time with Jesus, I must cut off the noise. What does it accomplish? It gets me to focus on Him and what He is saying to me. I can talk to him, cast my burdens upon Him, Praise Him, but most importantly listen to Him. He seems to always speak His Word to me. I've only heard Him speak otherwise one other time, but still it was based on scripture.

Today I spent time over coffee with a friend talking about Jesus and the power of His Word, I've seen somebody be Jesus to me today at work, and I've gotten to share Jesus with somebody today too. He's everything to me. He means more to me than my job, family, or friends. He's my Savior and I want to do all that I can to learn more of my amazing Savior whose grace amazes me every single day.

So here's a question for you:

1. Are you falling more in love with Jesus every single day?

Amazed by His Grace,
Alicia

90 Days with Jesus-Day 59 (Wednesday's blog)

When I think about how far spiritually I've grown on this 90 Day Journey I get all choked up. Before this journey I was as dry as the desert spiritually. However, sometimes it takes something like this journey to get you back on track.

Tonight I'd like to talk to you about what a dried up Christian walk might look like. You see it's easy to attend church on Sunday morning and sing Oh How I love Jesus and never crack the Bible, and half the time mumble 9-11 prayers. You know about 9-1-1- prayers. It's those prayers that we talk to God about when we are desperate. Oh how He longs to hear from us BEFORE we get desperate. BEFORE we get into that dry place. It's easy to get to that place if we don't stay in God's Word, attend corporate worship weekly, and pray without ceasing.

You see I've learned to read God's Word at a whole new level! I've learned that He means what He says and that I must be obedient to what that Holy Bible says whether I feel like it or not. I must walk in total obedience to God. My friend how I wished I could wave a magic wand and let you experience Christ in all of His fullness as I have here recently. However, you have to make that choice. Trust me it is so worth it.

Tonight I have one question for you:

1. Do you find yourself in a desert Christian walk????

Blessings,
Alicia Roark

90 Days with Jesus-Day 58-Tuesday's Blog

Heaven! It's where I'm going when I die! Not because I've been a nice person, or have done nice things for people. It's because I have a saving relationship with Jesus Christ. On this 58th day of this journey I've been thinking LOTS about Heaven.

Just yesterday a precious lady from our church went home to be with Jesus. In Sunday school we've been studying a little in Revelation about Heaven. This week we'll dig in real deep. However, my mind still can't help but wonder, what's Heaven really like? Sure, I've read and heard about the streets of gold and gates of pearl and mansions, and angels. My mind can't comprehend what Heaven is like and neither can yours. I firmly believe that God has some pretty big secrets He's holding onto!

Here's one thing that I know for sure my friend from church is free from pain, she's with the ONE she loved the most and I'm almost sure when she saw Jesus it took her breath away. One day we will all pass away from these earthly bodies, but the peace that passes all understanding is knowing where you are going when you die.

So tonight in memory of my friend I wrote this poem:

Your smile brightened up the room
and your family loved you so,
But on yesterday afternoon it was your time to go

You saw the face of Jesus who died to take away your sin,
I'm sure as He stood at those pearly gates He said, Welcome Home, Come on in.

Eternity begins today your mansion is just inside,
Don't worry about your friends and loved ones I'll wipe away the tears from their eyes.

Here in Heaven you'll have lots and lots of fun,
But there's one thing I must say before we begin,
Welcome Home and Well done!

Written by:
Alicia Roark

90 Days with Jesus-Day 57 (Monday's Blog)

On this day I have felt every emotion possible to man kind. I've felt sad, angry, frustrated...Jesus reached those limits too. He was fully God and fully man. Jesus was filled with emotion many times.

Once He was in the temple and became angry at some money changers. He got so upset he overthrew their tables and drove all people and animals out of there. Fully God, Fully man. He knows exactly how I feel. The question becomes what do I do with those emotions? I have one answer;pray.

Prayer can change many things. I've seen God change many a circumstance. Prayer is powerful and I use it often. Today will be no different.

Here's a question for you:

1. What do you do when you become hurt, angry, and sad?

2. Do you turn to Jesus or to another method?

In Him,
Alicia

90 Days with Jesus-Day 56 (Sunday's blog)

When you agree to go on a journey like this one, there's one thing you'll experience: CONVICTION. It's one a word we don't like and a place that most of us would rather not visit. On day one of this 90 day walk with Christ I gave God permission to talk to me, convict me of sin, and to speak to me however He chose. Guess where that put me?!!! Yep...in the passenger seat. I was no longer in control. Actually, I was never in control, but I was definitely doing it my way.

As I woke up this morning I was excited about Sunday School because we're talking about Heaven in the book of Revelation. I arrived and all seemed well! Sunday School came and went! Yes!!! It was great speaking and learning of Heaven! Joy flooded my soul and I was reminded once more that one day when God calls me home to be with Him, it will be such a glorious day!

Then, into worship I went. The singing was nice and the fellowship was great. My Pastor began the sermon. WHAM...Right between the eyes. CONVICTION...RIGHT TO THE VERY CORE OF ME...I'd been seeking God on a few things in my life. In one particular circumstance I'd been praying about how to be able to give to a specific cause that I wanted to give to. He began to speak so loudly that I got bad uncomfortable. I said, "Lord, I wanted you to make it abundantly clear as to what your answer was." His response: "How much more clearer did I have to make it? I put the answer in front of you multiple times. I gave it to you on the internet, I gave it to you at work and HERE IT IS IN THIS SERMON. JUST obey me." So, there I sat in a hard wooden pew feeling VERY CONVICTED.

There was just one thing left to do. I had to be obedient. So, starting tomorrow I'll be becoming very obedient to the cause of Christ and giving to a specific cause after my husband and I tithe. Why did it take so long?!!! Because I was so hard headed and I didn't want to hear it!

So, the question for you today is:

1. When is the last time you felt convicted over something God said to you?

2. HOw big a picture does He have to paint before you respond in obedience?!!!

-Alicia